"My name is Sam Tyler. I had an accident, and I woke up in 1973. Am I mad, in a coma, or back in time? Whatever's happened, it's like I've landed on a different planet. Now maybe if I can work out the reason, I can get home."
Or at least it's that long since we've been looking at promotion from the Football League basement.
Way back in 1973 the Bulls last escaped through the right end of the League's basement division. That season it was strong home form that carried us to second place in the table. A solitary home defeat that year was not echoed on the road, with just 17 goals being scored in 23 matches and just five wins being secured by the Bulls on their travels. At least it was only two points for a win, securing second place with just 58 points.
Every one of the top five that season, with Southport, Cambridge, Aldershot, and Newport, fell into the non-league abyss, with only the Bulls so far regaining their status. Three more of the table also are no longer League sides, with three more clambering out of the chasm in the intervening years, while Reading are now a Premier side. Ambitious Darlington spent the season as the worst team of the 92, while 'big club' Bradford were 16th and Peterboro 19th. Seven of the division are now League One, with only Barnsley now a Championship side.
The Encyclopedia Parrottica records that the Bulls dropped only one point from their last 17 home matches, and recorded an average home gate of nearly 9,000. "The King" Eric Redrobe scored nine in 26 games that season (and returns March 22nd for the Forum sponsorship) while Brian Owen scored eleven.
Regular goalie of 1973 David Icke may now think the world is run by lizards, but he kept clean sheets in his last six Edgar Street appearances. Mr Brown: We'll forgive any sight of a turquoise tracksuit for a similar record in our last six home games!
Fire up the funbus!